A Swift Kick & A Band-Aid

It Was A Different Life
When We Were Boys and Girls
Not Just A Different Time
It Was A Different World

I don't know about anyone else's week, but mine ... it was a huge let down.

But then again, that seems to be a pattern around these parts. Lots of anticipation and excitement, expectations high ... only to discover nothing is as you thought it would be. Not. even. close. We don't need to rehash my miserably disappointing experience in grad school as evidence, do we?

Is it any wonder I don't really allow myself to be excited all that often? There just doesn't seem to be much point.

Oh, and I have reconfirmed my position on people as a whole ... with a few notable exceptions ... people suck.

My Salary Didn't Go Up
But You Just Might Get A Kink-Fest

After the lunch I had today, I think these may become more "appropriate" shoes for work ...

I leave to your imagination what it will be like for me to show you where they go

The Office is No Place For a Kink-Fest ... Unless My Salary Seriously Goes Up
Cuz I've Found The Perfect Shoe

Ok ... seriously ... WOW

Amazon has truly shocked me. I don't really know why, but in searching for shoes today on Amazon ... I was shocked.

And educated.

I had no idea there were so many different types of fetish shoes. Nor did I realize that searching for my size shoe would bring so many of them up.

I have huge feet. I know this. I'm ok with this ...

My long toes come in very handy - and when you least expect it ;-)
Clodhoppers serve to provide a more painful whoopin when someone has it coming. There ARE advantages...

... Except when it comes to shoe shopping. Open toed shoes are less of a problem, but closed toed shoes ... freakin' nightmare. This is why I not only looked like a moron and wore strappy black sandals to my grandmother's funeral in February, in Kansas, but have spent days with shoes full of blood and carry rolls of athletic tape in my work bag.

Seriously though Amazon ... Buying shoes on the internet is hard enough. Do I really have to search through all the freaky sex shoes to get to what I need? And do I really need to be reminded that there are people out there with the time and money to buy/need freaky sex shoes while I am looking for "sensible" business shoes?

Not fair.

And I do not want to know where the heel of this shoe has been...

I'm Pretty Sure Its a Bad Thing When The Crap In Your Nose Turns Green

Yes, yes ... I know I left you loyal minions supporters without much to read for far too long. But I have my reasons!

- I'm getting ready for the Milblog Conference, putting my psudo-Kinko's uniform on again to make sure you all are informed once you get here. (Cuz you're all coming, right?)

- I've been shopping ... shopping my fat ass off for a big time coming up. And we all know how much I love shopping. I swear, I don't know what the hell designers are thinking. I find pants that are georgeous, long, and just downright perfect, except the waist goes up to my chest. Or ... I find a jacket that curves just right, hits at all the right spots, except the sleeves are a couple inches too short. Or ... I find the perfect shoe, in the wrong color. I just love shopping ...

- I'm sick ... again. I don't know what it is. I had it a month ago. I had it last year for a good several weeks. Last night, I had such terrible pain from the fluid trapped in my ear that I had to get up and take a shower just to ease it off a little. It worked temporarily. And a doc appt? Does little miss has-a-$2500-deductible-and-no-copays here look like she's made of money? I don't think so.

Spawning Is Much Better Than Spamming

Looks like I haven't been keeping a close enough eye on my little blog-bro, RSM ... He's brought a son into the blog-family.

Viking Medic was announced to the family this morning as our newest addition. He seems like a nice enough kid, but he is RSM's son after all ... so we'll see how long that lasts. J/K bro ...

Go check him out at The Quest for Valhalla

I Could Be Cold
I Could Be Ruthless
You Know I Could Be Just Like You

When you owe someone a MAJOR apology and write a letter that says:

It was a terribly cold Easter. When we were kids we froze but wore our Easter clothes anyway.

Thank you for your help & you are always welcome here. I don't know what I'd do without [grandson] or our church friends.

Happy Easter

You most certainly did NOT apologize.

Seriously...?

Bitch.

Hey, I'll Put Some New Shoes On
And Suddenly Everything Is Right

Ladies ... I think we've found our new anthem ...

Just try to look past the odd looking Brit singing it - he's got a good idea ... brand new shoes!

In a Second, You'll Be Wrapped Around My Finger
Cuz I Can Cuz I Can Do It Better

Mr. CSI ... *drool* (now that he got rid of that silly shaggy dog look)

Did I mention *drool* ?

So what do you say George? I could be your girlfriend ...

Juicy Lucy Strikes Again

I almost forgot that I had blogged about Juicy Lucy way back when. So in Acidman's honor and on Assrot's behalf, here's another story ...

Scene: 1 dead lady, 1 tissue bucket, 6 teenagers assigned to expose muscle tissue and learn everything there is to know about each one - action, origin, insertion, nerve

By this point, we had spent several of our dissection days unpuddling the fluid that earned Lucy her name. She was fairly dry, kept moist instead by a mist sprayed on her at the end of every dissection day. Without her gallons of fluid to plump her up, she sagged and almost caved in places.

We had taken great care to peel her skin off in sheets, exposing blood vessels, muscle, connective tissue, tendons, ligaments, and fat. The fat was blocking a clear view of everything else we needed to see so it had to go. Carefully removed, tweeze by tweeze of our tiny little tools meant to keep every structure in tact.

Being that there were six of us and one tissue bucket to hold everything we removed from Lucy, we had to find somewhere else to dump our tweezers full of fat. Where better than a pile on her torso?

Note, her torso was also one of those caved in places that looked remarkably like a bowl at the end of the day ... a bowl full of little yellow globs of fat ...

Or if you're a teenager ...

A bowl full of jujubes!!

But they were renamed Ju-Lu-bes, of course (and I've never eaten them again!)

Year Two: I'm Still Here!

Its officially two years today since content first landed on the pages of this blog.

A lot has happened in two years.

I am reminded that even though this site was not my first jump into blogging, I am still blogging for the same reasons. I am still searching for words to understand my world (and the things that happen in it), trying to connect my fingers to my heart so that my head may glimpse the hidden perspective.

More often than not, I feel like I am venting ... complaining with anger about something that cannot be changed. It does not stop me from believing that I have the power to influence the world like it could. Instead, I find myself motivated to find another solution, a way around the roadblock, insistent that I can prevail.

I'm not sure how the humor creeps in, but it does ... maybe we'd all go a little insane if it didn't.

So ... Happy Blogiversary!!

Because Its Draggin Me Down
Oh I'd Like To Know About When
When Does It All Turn Around?