December 24, 2005


I think I've hit a record here ...

Less than 24 hours in town and already I've been reduced to tears

You see, I've got half the family up in arms because I've decided to put my foot down this year. And in defending myself I ended up in a reddened faced ball of tears, with my Scotch-Irish heritage giving away just how upset I really was as my whole neck turned a blushing, blotchy, bright red too.

For at least six holiday seasons I have had to put up with the ice queen my father married a few years ago. Every time we meet, she is mean. Just plain mean. I am not supposed to talk about it because it makes my dad uncomfortable. I am supposed to be the bigger person and let it go. I am supposed to brush it off and just accept that it is the way she is, it is nothing personal.

Well you know what? It is personal. It is hurtful. It is uncalled for. And I never hear so much as an "it is unfortunate that she treats you this way" out of my father.

I believe I have been patient. I believe I have been tolerant of the time it takes to blend two instant families. I even understand that no amount of will to do so can change another person's thoughts or behaviors. However, that time of leniency has run out and I have decided that there will be no more. I love my father, I want to see him, and I want to spend Christmas with his side of my family, but I refuse to do it at his house and on her turf. Because if my father cannot nuture my discomfort and insult at the hands of his wife, then I will not be willfully wounded on his behalf.

But to the rest of the family, I am just a bitch...

Posted by Princess Cat at December 24, 2005 02:50 AM @ 02:50 AM in Drama // Permalink | TrackBack

... whoa... a Father who would let that happen needs to do some re-evaluation...

Posted by: Eric at December 24, 2005 08:55 AM

hey baby I will call you today while making cookies....

damn girl...I send big hugs and guess what you are right here, enough is enough...

this is part of why I am "home this year"...

I person can only take sooo much doll.

see you soon

Posted by: armywifetoddlermom at December 24, 2005 11:44 AM

IMHO 'tis better to be a bitch with a spine than take the abuse from anyone. I feel your pain, but think you are doing the right thing. If you don't stand up for yourself, no one else is going to.

Posted by: MizfiTroll at December 24, 2005 05:21 PM

And you know I'm here for you if AWTM can't get to the phone.

Posted by: RSM at December 24, 2005 08:26 PM

That really is a damned shame. Maybe the very next time the woman is mean, you should pack your stuff and go. Maybe that would provide the clue your dad needs to know that he has to do something about the situation.

If he doesn't get it, then I'd arrange to spend future time with him only when she is not around.

Still, it's a damned shame, and I feel very bad for you.

Try to have a Merry Christmas in spite of it all.

Posted by: Jim - PRS at December 24, 2005 08:45 PM

I dealt with that once upon a time. Eventually, my father divorced her and apologized for ever condoning her behavior towards me.

She's probably mean to you because she's jealous of what a great relationship you have with your father.

Posted by: Dorothy at December 24, 2005 10:38 PM