February 08, 2009

My Milkshake Brings All the Boys to the Yard

I swear to God ... no one should get married ... ever ...

rather, no one should ever have a wedding ...

My biggest fear for the big day??? wait for it ...

... my mom ...

and her boobs

Yes, I am terrified of my mom and her boobs ...

Since she had them reduced and lifted, she seems to think there isn't all that much there to show off (trust me, THERE IS!) Combine that with her previous "I feel good about myself" clothing purchases ... its enough to keep me up at night.

She at least did me the courtesy of asking what I wanted her to wear, but she has balked at my response and threatened to wear whatever she feels like. (She didn't really think it was cool when I said that I reserved the right to keep her out of the photos then...but hey, she's not paying for them and it isn't her wedding...)

Seriously, if you didn't like your mom before you decided to have a wedding, you're REALLY not going to like her afterward.

We should have eloped ...

Posted by Princess Cat at February 8, 2009 07:24 PM @ 07:24 PM in Drama // Permalink | TrackBack

I think my mom SO tops whatever yours could do at your wedding. After all, my mom is a stoner and her legs were covered with scabbed-over mosquito bites from her sitting on her back porch getting high all the time during mosquito season.

That and she was having a mental break with reality at my wedding.

Have your mom pose at the edge of photos so you can cut her out.

Posted by: Dorothy at February 8, 2009 10:03 PM

Wedding ceremonies are the most miserable days of most peoples' lives. I think they would improve somewhat if all family members were barred from attending.

Just your spouse to be and a few close friends would probably make a much better day for all involved.

Good luck sweetie. Please post pictures of mom's boobs so we can either drool or laugh.



Posted by: Assrot at February 12, 2009 01:26 PM